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Lazy Pantyhose

August 8, 2008

Skip leans in close, nodding forcefully as he blows a boozy, “You know?” into Lily’s face. His floppy hair tickles Lily’s cheek each time he makes a forceful point. Now, he’s jabbing her chest with a finger to drive home his point, the sort of thing a man should really do only to another man. Or, a woman should only do to a man she isn’t keen to see again.

A few drinks ago, Skip would have known this, but even such simple distinctions are beyond him now. It’s midnight, and Skip has begun peppering his conversation with things like, “Lily, you’re a very pretty girl, but let me tell you something about pretty girls: they’re trouble.” That’s the sort of drunk Skip becomes: a bit moronic, but also funny in a sweet kind of way, Lily thinks. Or, so drunken Lily thinks. Uh oh.

She teeters this way and that on heels bought for this occasion, casually bends to hike up the stupid sagging pantyhose she chose to match the shoes. She’s had way too much to drink, but Lily blames the pantyhose for that. Even their name sounds like trouble. Panty. Hose. See? Trouble.

And the way they slip and sag? Terrible! Lazy leggings. They have one job – stay up – and even that is too taxing…

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2 Comments leave one →
  1. looka permalink
    August 20, 2008 8:48 am

    …drunk decisions – ohohoh, not alone the the sight parts into two pictures but also the mind, hell! can’t I be both: sincere and stumbling?

  2. Amanda permalink
    August 22, 2008 2:29 pm

    Of course! Often, stumbling makes you even more sincere than when you are fit enough to walk a straight line.

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