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When in Montréal… (Bad Lines: Part One)

September 19, 2008


He was wearing one of those nylon lariats, the kind handed out at team-building events or stuffed in bags of trade-show swag. An assortment of keys, security swipe-cards and mini plastic Daffy Ducks swung from his neck like a millstone. We saw him coming a mile away, and yes, he deserves every ounce of cliché in that figure of speech.

“D’ou venez vous?” he slurred, one hand on his hip, the other propped on our little bar table and making our perfect martinis tilt and slop.

“De Toronto,” we replied. Rachel with one eyebrow raised. Me probably smirking in a way I would ordinarily consider rude, although if we’re talking bad manners, he started it.

“Toronto! That…that is disgusting. So, you ladies, you are doing what tonight? I say you come with me!”

Instead, we tossed back our martinis, collected our things and sauntered away in what I can only hope met his expectations of a pair of Toronto ladies out on the town.

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3 Comments leave one →
  1. Dana McCauley permalink
    September 23, 2008 10:08 pm

    You did the only rational and smart thing. Phew! Way to dodge a francaphone bullet!

  2. Amanda permalink
    September 24, 2008 9:55 pm

    So so true…the thing is, once out on the street, we came face to face with additional “well-mannered” come-ons, including a guy who nudged his friend, pointed, and suggested, “Hey, I betchoo want some of that!” Henceforth, Rachel and I shall travel with chaperons bearing names like Great-Aunt Prue.

  3. looka permalink
    September 30, 2008 2:02 am

    Would I not sense, so well mannered spoken, that a woman takes the best care of herself and as it always is, has no need for senselessly audascious presented, false manliness, the elsely wild gesticulating five fingers of my right hand would find center of one point – at the guys of no respects face and other sections which need some balance and that take tending to.

    …Come on boys, show some wit!

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