Why My Job Bends My Mind Like a Spoon
Give my filing cabinet key to the office temp, who will review all my files and make a chart plotting particular data in advance of an upcoming meeting. She will have a spreadsheet to complete, and will require access to the hard copies of my files, in order to obtain these details. This was a bit confusing, in light of a second set of directions: that I book several hours per day, from now till next week, in order to compile all the same data myself.
Clarification provided initially, upon my request:
Really, the office temp will be waiting for me to add as much data as possible to the spreadsheet, just off the top of my head. If there is information I can’t recall or am uncertain about, those sections on the spreadsheet will remain blank. At this point, the temp will search for the missing details, in order to complete the spreadsheet before the upcoming meeting. I should also note that there is a blue section at the top of the spreadsheet, and I am to ignore the highlighted cases in that portion completely.
Actual, real instructions, extracted through five minutes of plodding, laborious, interrogation conducted by me:
There is a spreadsheet. It has a blue section at the top, highlighting certain cases. It has a section at the bottom without any highlighting. Before the meeting, I need to go through the blue section and the non-blue section, and fill in as much as possible off the top of my head. Then, I am to manually review all cases where there is missing information, so that I can fill in all the sections completely. This should all be completed by me, without the temp’s assistance. But, as per the original email, the temp needs access to my filing cabinet so she requires my key. She is there right now, rummaging around. One can only imagine what she might be looking for.