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You Know What She DID?!

December 18, 2010

The past couple weeks, I’ve been on the lookout for smile-motivators. Things to tuck away for quick reference like glossy stones in a pocket to rub anxiously with my thumb. Like the small toy bunny who wears a very small scarf and who travels in my pocket each time I fly by plane. I hate flying, it makes my heart shake in my chest. And so, the little toy bunny rides in my coat pocket and I stroke his cloth ear during take-off and landing. The rest of the flight, the bunny just, you know, hangs out and waits to complete the second half of his job.

Topping the list of smile talismans this week is an overheard conversation that reached me by one further degree of remove. Posted to a friend’s social networking page, this snippet was overheard by my friend while he drove past a young man who was freaking out via cellphone over a romantic transgression.Indignant, betrayed, the poor honey shared his anguish at top volume:

“I don’t give a fuck, man! You know what she did? She went to Alex’s house and had SEX with him! She told she was a virgin! I will never forgive her for this! And she told me she loved me! I can’t believe this!”

My favourite part? …and she had SEX with him! Ah, man, not to scoop pleasure from another person’s distress, but that just cracks me up. As my friend commented, “the poor fucker. He’ll learn.”

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